i hate times like this. you get so caught up in everything thats going on, all life's minute frusterations, consumed by frivolous worry and not consumed by the Word. i just get so angry over little things that dont matter, swear and yell at the computer when it doesnt work how i want it to or as fast as i want it to, talk about someone or think unkind thoughts about someone else when i get pissed off. i mean dont you ever just feel like everything you do is wrong? like you conciously think,"oh, that was bad....i shouldnt have done that." but then ten minutes later you find yourself unconciously doing it or something equally wrong again? i dont do it on purpose, but i feel so far from God at this point. i haven'thad some positive re-enforcement in a while....i need a serious dose of God right now. like, i want to just be taken away with love and relief, swept up in my passion for my Savior, but i just have such a hard time somtetimes getting into a routine, a daily concentration on what i need to do, what i need to be focusing on and who i need to be thinking of.
--You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times. And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you. But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry, is how long must I wait to be with You? I close my eyes and I see your face, if home's where my heart is then I'm out of place. Lord won't you give me strength to make it through somehow? I've never been more homesick than now. Help me Lord because I don't understand Your ways. The reason I wonder if I'll ever know but even if You showed my the hurt would be the same. Because I'm still here so far away from home, in Christ there are no goodbyes, in Christ there is no end. So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have, to see you again.--
-MercyMe: Homesick (Undone)
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