"I suppose what I wanted back then is what every Christian wants, whether they understand themselves or not. What I wanted was God. I wanted tangible interaction. But even more than that, to be honest, I wanted to know who I was. I felt like a robot or an insect or a mysterious blob floating around in the universe. I believed if I could contact God, He would be able to explain who and why I was."
--Don Miller, Blue like Jazz
that feels like something i have either written in a past life or something i could have easily written a few weeks ago. thats exactly what i longed for--i even uttered those words. i wanted God to audibly interact with me. i felt alone, desolate, unimportant, in significant...i could go on and on. i didnt feel like God remembered me, heard me...was aware of me. He made it pretty clear a week and a half ago that--indeed--He still knows who i am and what i need.
I'd really reccomend this book ^ to anyone. I'm so glad Bryan lent it to me, it's really been...not just helpful...not insightful...just....an ironic coincidence it seems. the things he talks about and things he says, or things he's felt or feels, the way he describes stuff...its like i took the form of a twenty-something male residing in oregon and wrote a book to myself that i could read as a 17 year old floridian girl. its just odd you know? how one person can describe their life--their trials, sturggles, doubts, ideas, concerns...whatever...and they can be so identical to what you yourself feel. God never ceases to amaze me with what or who He puts in my path.
.:There are things you choose to believe, and beliefs that choose you:.
Don Miller
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