"tell me how i'm supposed to breathe with no air?"

i feel like a total ass. truly, i mean it embarrasses me to think about, much less talk about. i'm an idiot. and i made an enormous mistake. and i blew it. and i guess i deserve it. i cant expect that everything will work out how i want just because i finally sorted my brain out. thats a selfish thought. but in a way it's what i expected. NOT being turned down. and that sucked. a lottttttttttt. no sleep. no fun. i've been thinking about it all freaking day.

i feel like julia roberts in Notting Hill. kind of. i'm not a celebrity, but hey. same concept. and it did not turn out the way the movie ended. soooo. cool.

i'm just so mad at myself at throwing the best thing i could have asked for away like it was disposable. because you arent. and i dont know what my problem is.


"We are all fools in love."

Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice, Charlotte