your time has expired.

so. the 4 months or less rule is back in effect.

i find it ironic that the one person who breaks it couldnt actually care about me. that makes no sense.

why the HELL did you leave those damn peach rings in my car. thats been bothering me since i looked over and saw them placed ever so carefully in my doorhandle halfway home on friday. oh yeah and by the way, you can man it up and CALL me back. come on. and you hope i'm alright? are you serious? hellooooo. of course i'm not freaking alright. did you miss the last week? yeah. not a good one. miss the part where i said this isnt what i wanted? yeah. but it was this or be a doormat. so i chose this. and i realize i chose it, but that doesnt make me like it. i hate it.

nope. i couldnt make one guy grow up, couldn't make one love me, cant make you happy. i know it isnt my fault, its nothing i did wrong...but i feel like i'm..i dunno. i cant think of the right word for it, but i feel inferior i guess is ok..sometimes. even though i know its stupid. because even though none of those things are my fault, i cant control them, it makes me wonder why it keeps happening.

it just kills me that i was so happy after being kind of sad. and now i'm sad again. we were good. and now we aren't. it was like a teaser. not fun. i dont want to be happy for just a few months. i want forever.





ohhh my poor tummy cannot take more of this. poor, poor tummy.