we are all we have deep down--and all we can save.

this is what i need...desire...fantasize about...want more than anything--i want this kind of love.

"Oh this is what i need in love: spinning in the sun and laughing [really] hard. I need desire (and secret things) and "AHHH's" and i need to be told brave true words. I need myself. i need my  v o i c e . i need a partner who will giggle + cherish me to my bones. i need real, real, real genuiness and i need strength. i need true loving gestures + lots of drawing on the floor. i need honest dinner time talking. i need to be met  half way . i need to feel needed. i need to [surrender]--i need to be understood. i need to not be mocked when i am being real. i need true kindness and love that  g*l*o*w*s  brightly."

---> sabrina ward harrison:.

quotes i passionately relate and adore...

"there is a reason and there is a meaning...you will know in time, but time itself will choose the moment."   ...kent nerburn

"if you're not yourself, then who will be?"

"these are the days that must happen to you..."   walt whitman...

"be patient with all that is unsolved in your heart and learn to love the questions."  .rilke.

"i think what is unlived and unexpressed in love hurts the most."  sabrina ward harrison.:.

i cant explain to you how infitinitely close i feel to this woman. i dont know her, i know only the bits she is graceful enough to share with the world in her books, but i feel as if i know her intimately, as if she and i are long-time friends that have simply lost touch. maybe i feel so close to her because i feel that in many ways i am her. i have been searching and exploring this thing that has become my life for so long, trying to accept who i am and what i will always be forever. loving myself is so hard, and i pretty much suck at it--but its a journey we all must take and i feel our journeys have been down the same road....leading to the same place in time. she inspires me to create the deepest longings of my heart and to express my thoughts and fears and loves and hates to the world--to be brave on the rocks. i admire all her work and her willingness to be so open about experiences that are so deeply personal and initmate. when i read about her struggles i feel as if i have written the words myself..thats how similar we are. our thoughts and feelings seem to collide in this paralled universe where we have temporarily become one spirit longing to find meaning and purpose and acceptance in this chaotic whirlwind that is life. to live it with purpose and take risks of the soul no matter what the cost, because no matter how much it hurts..sometimes we must all  j u m p ----->

     here is to the soul that inspires mine to sing in the midst of sorrow and fear, to dance in the fog of uncertainty, to profess words of love to the person in my life who needs it most...me.